It has been a wonderful Shabbat/Sabbath today. I spoke in sacrament about goal setting. I am so grateful it went ok, I didn't have time to prepare until 30 minutes before sacrament meeting. It definitely could have been better, but oh well.
Words cannot express the feelings in my heart right now.
This afternoon was an incredible experience. We walked to the Garden of Gethsemane only a few minutes away. The guard let us go into a secluded section that only 5 of us were allowed in. The feeling was incredibly peaceful and secluded from the hustle and bustle in the streets just outside the gate. I sat silently off on my own for quite some time. I couldn't help but weep as I thought about the sacrifice my older brother made for me personally. I couldn't help but be grateful of Him taking upon Himself my every pain, sickness, infirmity. Not only did He suffer for the things I willfully do wrong, but also the things that happen to me out of my control. I don't understand the Atonement. I don't know how He did it or how it works. It is too awe-some to comprehend. But I do know it happened. I know that He knows me personally. That He sees me not for who I am, but who I can become if I will but lean on Him. If only I can trust His will more, not my own.
I asked a gardener there about the Olive Trees. He said that they live forever and are continually producing fruit. He pointed out the oldest tree in the garden, more than 2,000 years old, which would have been there at the time of Christ. It is incomprehensible to think about what those trees witnessed and felt as they watched their/my creator suffer.
I marvel that He would descend from His throne divine. To rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine. That He should extend His great love unto such as I. Oh it is wonderful that He should care for me enough to die for me. Oh it is wonderful, wonderful to me.